Constructing a New List

I don’t feel well today.  I woke up with a stuffy head and my energy zapped.  I’m exhausted.  But, I cannot be sick today.  This is the one day all week that I have time to buckle down and get some real work done.  I have a list.  

• Change the sheets.  
• Balance the budget.  
• Workout.
• Clean the vacuum filter.  

It’s all there on my list.  And I can barely sit in this chair long enough to type a few words.  Words that don’t want to gel together in my head or on my screen.

My body is saying one thing but I am not in the mood to hear it.  I have plans and they don’t include anything about this head cold.  Doesn’t my body know: I have a list!

But, then, there is a voice—just audible over the demands of that list.  It’s asking where I am on that list.  Wondering if I really will notice me.  Questioning whether I am sincere when I say I will show up for myself.

Even through the fog in my head, I know what I will answer.  Some days, the very best way to take care of myself will be with a to do list, and the rush that comes from flying through it.  But, my body is telling me that that is not today.

So, I will modify my list.  The vacuum filter and the workout will wait.

Today’s new list:

• Eat a warm bowl of soup for breakfast because that’s what sounds good to my aching head.
• Crawl right back in bed after I put the kids on the bus.

Today, my task will be to be gentle with myself.  It will be trust that I will get to the List another day.  And that this is enough.